With many things in life it's inevetable we grow up and fall in love...Who are we attracted to...Who do we choose...why do we choose them? These are some of the many questions we face when the time comes.

What happens if that person is from another country? What happens if that person is from another continent? With a different set of beliefs and customs?

I was at one time a firm believer in love conquers all, a romantic with a rose-tinted outlook on life. But now at the age of 32 and a string of failed relationships behind me, with people very different from myself, I have to wonder...Is it really possible to have a loving, meaningful relationship with somebody who doesn't truely understand you or where you come from?

I'm not innocent in all of this, was there times where I could have tried to understand and appreciate there is another way of doing things? That my way is not always the best? Maybe!

Would it be fair to bring children into the world, where the parents don't share the same beliefs?

The expectations in life, the goals and ambitions, surely they must be the same?

I try not to over-analyze, but sometimes you have to wonder...

So, the out-come in all of this will probably be to carry on regardless, hoping one day I hit the jackpot...

I would love to hear the thoughts of members on cross-culture dating and relationships.

dannyboy wrote:
With many things in life it's inevetable we grow up and fall in love...Who are we attracted to...Who do we choose...why do we choose them? These are some of the many questions we face when the time comes.

What happens if that person is from another country? What happens if that person is from another continent? With a different set of beliefs and customs?

I was at one time a firm believer in love conquers all, a romantic with a rose-tinted outlook on life. But now at the age of 32 and a string of failed relationships behind me, with people very different from myself, I have to wonder...Is it really possible to have a loving, meaningful relationship with somebody who doesn't truely understand you or where you come from?

I'm not innocent in all of this, was there times where I could have tried to understand and appreciate there is another way of doing things? That my way is not always the best? Maybe!

Would it be fair to bring children into the world, where the parents don't share the same beliefs?

The expectations in life, the goals and ambitions, surely they must be the same?

I try not to over-analyze, but sometimes you have to wonder...

So, the out-come in all of this will probably be to carry on regardless, hoping one day I hit the jackpot...

I would love to hear the thoughts of members on cross-culture dating and relationships.

LOVE has no boundaries.

I believe loving is one of our sense of achievements and it does not choose or rejoice in errors and faults but exerts more efforts for better living.

I agree we often hear the troubles on cross-cultural relationships but what's new? Even those who are in the same culture have the same problem.

Guess the issue is not really in the culture, I think we sometimes blame culture denying what and where the real problem is but actually it's in our individual minds and attitudes. Each of us are different from the other regardless of where we are from ,it's up to us how do we manage to adjust and accept both ourselves and our partnes. Do I have to add, respect?

A good friend of ours has just started again on the dating scene after years of having been disillusioned with so many things around this most mysterious of all human experiences - love.

Sabi ng friend namin, who has had past relationships with people from different cultural and religious backgrounds, iba pa rin pag pareho kayo ng kultura, salita at paniniwala.

Although may mga successful na marriages na inter-racial, inter-religion, inter-cultural, mas malalim ang relationship KUNG tamang tao ang iyong karelasyon, at nagkataong magkapareho kayo ng backgrounds sa buhay. Siyempre, pag kapwa mo Pilipino, at magkapareho kayo ng salitang gamit, mas madaling magkaintindihan.

Pero, gaya nga ng sinabi ni Metallic Cotton, "Even those who are in the same culture have the same problem." Kaya, pag gusto mong less ang challenges sa communication and understanding between you and your partner, kailangang nagkakaintindihan kayo ng kanya-kanyang backgrounds, and at the same time, the individual personalities also have to by in sync.

Kunyari, may mga Pilipino na Westernized na ang thinking. Kaya, ang hahanapin nilang kapartner, ay yung nakaka-accept ng kanilang thinking and principles sa buhay. Hindi na magiging masaya ang buhay kung sila ay magpapartner sa isang 'traditionally Pinoy' pa rin ang thinking, beliefs and life principles.

So, bottom line, mahirap mag generalize. Kasi, iba-iba ang case and circumstance ng bawat isa. Most important is talagang kilalang-kilala niyo ang bawat isa. And despite of that, (or because of that), you accept one another, faults, positive qualities and all!

Madam H wrote:
So, bottom line, mahirap mag generalize. Kasi, iba-iba ang case and circumstance ng bawat isa. Most important is talagang kilalang-kilala niyo ang bawat isa. And despite of that, (or because of that), you accept one another, faults, positive qualities and all!
agree!! it's a case to case basis, but in every new relationship you can't say you really knew each other very well, there are lots of things to be discovered (good or bad) along the way which is part of growing in a relationship. for me the best way to a successful relationship is meeting half way, having compromises in different aspects will help.